When Ms. Anna arrived, Allie had to show her her bedroom and then we went right into eating. The girls sat where they always sit for lunch and I played the radio like I usually do. I wanted to keep the setting basically the same as our normal routine so Ms. Anna could see how our lunches go.
I don't even know how to explain it but Allie ate. She ate 1/2 a peanut butter & jelly sandwich and 1/2 cup of cottage cheese. She would never eat that much for me or Matt - she would simply take 1-2 bites then tell me she wants a tube feeding. I'm getting very frustrated with the fact that Allie eats for Ms. Anna but not for me. I do the same things that Ms. Anna does but Allie just doesn't listen. I know it's not just me, my dad has tried and tried and tried to get Allie to eat and she simply refuses. He has been trying for 3 years and honestly he's tried just as hard as Matt and I.
Seeing Allie eat is wonderful yet it leaves me wondering why in the world she eats so well for Ms. Anna and not us???? I know she can eat and she can handle a good amount of food so part of me wants to strap her in a seat and make her eat. However, I know that making meal time a bad experience will only make things worse. But I feel like I'm loosing this battle and I need to gain control. I'm beginning to think there is something wrong with me and that's the reason i cannot get Allie to eat. I don't know - it's simply frustrating.
Last night for supper, Allie requested pizza. So, I grilled chicken for us and cooked a pizza for her. I thought since she was really requesting something specific, she would eat. I cut up a whole (small) piece and of course, Allie ate 2 bites and I couldn't keep her at the table. I tried putting her back on her chair and she just kicked and screamed and requested a tube feeding. It's like that for almost every meal with Allie - she takes 1-2 bites and she's done. I just don't get it.
I have noticed through Allie's eating issues, if she is going to eat a meal during the day, it's lunch. So, now I'm thinking that we might have to have Ms. Anna come to our house for breakfast or supper so she can observe one of those meals. Allie rarely eats breakfast and it's even more rare for her to eat a decent supper. I'm also thinking it might be better to have Ms. Anna over as a guest instead of a therapist so she can simply sit across from the table and observe all of Allie's behavior during the meal. There are so many things I want to try and so many different ideas to try new things. One thing I know for sure is I cannot get this girl to eat on my own. I need professional help and as the days go on, I'm thinking I'm going to need all the professional help I can get.
So, to little Ms. Allie - thank you for making me look like a complete goof today. I constantly say, Allie does not eat like a typical child, she simply refuses most of the time". Yet today, you ate in front of Ms. Anna and you only got up from your chair about 5 times. You ate more for lunch today (at home) than I have ever seen you eat. Way to go Allie - I'm proud of you but next time, please show Ms. Anna your true colors because this momma knows your putting on a show - lol.
Ms. Anna has agreed to come to the house again for a feeding session. I'm hoping we can get at least 1 in-home feeding session in a week or even 2 :)
Don't get me wrong - I'm rejoicing that Allie is eating and if I have to bring Ms. Anna with us everywhere, I will do it (if she's okay with that - haha)
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| The girls mini golfing - Chloe's field trip for preschool |
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